Thursday, 16 February 2012

‎51 Reasons:Uri muZimba chaiye ramba tinzwe

YOU KNOW YOU ARE FROM ZIMBABWE IF......
1. You only buy drinks when you have visitors.
2. You think BORED means annoyed, frustrated or disappointed (as inwaakundibhowa manje)
... 3. You cannot count up to ten in your own language and are proud of it
4. You think plastic bag and paper bag are the same thing.
5. You can HEAR smells.(ndiri kunzwa kasmero)

6. You think buses STAND (bhazi rakamira) and cars DIE.(yafa ka?)
7. You think money can be EATEN. ( akadya mari yangu!!)
8. You ever had to get off "after hump", "palight" or "pagiveway"
"pano mukuwasha", "pamarara" , "pamujakaranda wechi 2","padombo"
9. You think the whole of the U.K is London .
10. You think perfume and deodorant is the same thing.
11. You ever had to smack your T.V to get better reception.
12. You know what "the Epilogue" on the T.V is.
13. You know what VISIONA is.
14 You only go to the dentist when you have a toothache.

15. You think that Coca-cola is the generic name for allsoftdrinks,>Cobra> for all floor polish, Surf for all washing powder &Colgate for all toothpaste
16. You can actually understand what is said by Tsitsi Mawarire, KudziMarudza and Rueben Barwe.
17. You only know two types of salad- coleslaw and coleslaw.
18. You only have 3 spices- salt, mhiripiri and Royco usavi mix.
19. You believe in recycling- old tyres make good shoes, old stockingsare great for shining the floor, newspaper makes good toilet paper andold cars make good chicken coops.

20. You know how to fit 10 people into a sedan.
21. You know there are two classes of people- maNOSE and maSRB but arenot sure where you belong.
22. You bad-mouth the gvt but never vote.
23. You hear the word WEDDING and immediately think of STEPS.
24. You know what DAMAGE is, in relation to marriage.
25. Your idea of eating out is going to Chicken Inn.
26. It takes a whole day and a half to get a passport or an I.D.
27. You have seen the inside of a blair toilet.
28. You have ever walked to a drive-inn cinema.

30. For you christmas means new clothes, and christmas dinner is riceand chicken.
32. You have ever named your dog after animals that are not remotelyrelated to dogs. e.g. Tiger and Spider.
33. You think everyone from another country is better than you.
34. You know all the 4 seasons, Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer andChristmas.
35. You think of the 4 major food groups as Beef, Chicken, Sadza & Tea.
40. You know several Muzenda jokes.

45. You forward this to other Zimbabweans
46. Going to your rural home is going on holiday
47. your fridge usually has 2ltr mazoe containers filled with wateronly
48. you know all the specs of the latest BMW, Merc or Lexus but you donot own even a bicycle
49.You visit a relative without prior notice and will try to stay foras long as possible (nekuti pane chikafu...)
50. You've never been to the Falls, Kariba or Eastern Highlands buthave been to Joburg, Dubai etc several times (madhiri...!)

51. You watch TV whilst your radio is on.

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